i'm still here. somehow.
suicide
┤ i'm still here. somehow. ┤
emphasis on somehow
its almost the end of november, the end of the year is coming a lot faster than ive thought. damn i do not keep up with time. time is weird lol
⚠️ SPOILER: click to show
okay. time for nepeta to get edgy. click on the spoiler box for my edgyness
so, youre wondering why im making this blog post. yes?? well. earlier this year i swore that i wouldnt make it past 2024. that i'd be fucking dead by the end of the year. some nights, i'd think how my friends would react to my death. i contemplated it often. one night it got so bad that i literally almost considered going through with an attempt. yeah. it fucking sucked. 1/10 wouldnt recommend
despite everything, i'm still fucking glad im here. coding has a lot to answer for for me still being here. finding a new hobby and shit, finally finding something that made me really happy and kept me busy, yknow?? i started wappydog as a silly little project but then it turned into something so much more bigger.
i think im gonna be okay. its hard for me to say that, but its true. sadly i dont have therapy (thanks soooo much camhs) now but ive just been finding more coping mechanisms for myself, drawing the chipjinks is one of them :o] maybe i finally have a happy ending for this shit?? a happy ending for my 2023?? no fucking idea. im trying my best guys this world is stressful ;__;